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 BERMUDA POLICE.COM POLICING & CRIME ON THE ISLANDS OF BERMUDA


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A Collection of Humorous material

A koala bear sneaks into a prostitute's apartment through a window and starts to eat her out. She just starts to get into it but the koala stops and begins to leave. "Hey, Mr. koala bear," she said, "I'm a prostitute, so I'll need your money." The koala bear looked at her confused so she got a dictionary and looked up the word "prostitute" and read "A woman who sells her body for cash." The koala bear took the dictionary from her and looked up the term "koala bear." It said, "An Australian mammal, eats bushes and leaves."

Thank you P.K.

What would it take to get the Beetles back together?

Three Bullets

Remaining the best loved song in Wales:

WHERE THE SHEEP HAVE NO NAME by EWE 2

Two nuns are out driving when a vampire drops onto the bonnet of their car. "Quick sister," screams one nun, "Show him your cross" So the other nun leans out of the window and shouts, "Oi You, get off my fucking car".

Artificial insemination technician fired for drinking on the job.

Q: How do you tell if any jelly babies are illegitimate?

A: Turn the bag upside down and wait for the bastards to fall out.

The probability that someone is watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your actions

Q: What do you do when you come across an elepahnt in the jungle?

A: Wipe him off and apologise.

WOMEN:  hard to find a sensitive, caring, good looking man?  why? 

they have boyfriends.

I love to go down to the park and watch the children jumping about, screaming and shouting. They don't know I'm using blanks.

 

 

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