Positions Vacant

Mountain Rescue
Qualified staff required as a matter of urgency. icestation@birmuda.com

Railway staff
Train drivers and crowd control staff for the Trans Birmuda Railway (TBR).  Successful applicants will stand out from the crowd, be proficient in whistling, have at least 40 years experience and be familiar with the latest queuing techniques.

Send your C.V. in the body of the message text to trainspotters@birmuda.com 



Paddy Field Maintenance

Rice is native to Birmuda and has been cultivated for more than 7000 years; evidence of cultivation has been found in eastern Birmuda dating from before 5000 BC.   In developing countries such as Birmuda, almost all cultivation is performed by hand.  Your responsibilities will include overseeing production, exportation of crop and exploitation of the 3,500, work force.  e-mail: PatrickJosephField@birmuda.com
Riot police

Police Officers

Officers with riot experience required.  Whilst a relatively peaceful country, Birmuda is not without its problems.  Narcotics are freely available and will almost certainly be legalised within the next year. Prostitution is non-existent, the country being rife with enthusiastic amateurs.  An officer's role is primarily to keep the peace and prevent matrimonial disputes.  Officers patrol in twos; one that can read, one that can write.  The exception is during the hours of darkness when officers will move in threes.  If there is lightening, an officer need not venture from the station, but they must refrain from taking the opportunity to investigate each other. e-mail: corrupt@birmuda.com

Long Distance Lorry Drivers

Birmuda Industries Group has immediate employment for A-Rated Self-Employed drivers

Don't let a great job opportunity pass you by!  We have the types of driving jobs that you are looking for, and if we don't we will try to find that type of job for you. Online Application is available! e-mail BIG ARSE drivers today

Herpetological Officer
The country has three indigenous species, all of which are highly poisonous; the Birmuda laid-back, the Puff-daddy adder and the one-eyed bushmaster snake.

A professional keeper and control officer is required for the maintenance and husbandry following the sudden departure of our resident specialist (funeral to be held April 7th).

e-mail: immune@birmuda.com


River Systems Water Filtration Engineer

Believing that river authorities can and must play a vital part in preserving the water resources of Birmuda at the quality necessary for their optimum beneficial use by the people of the country, the River Authorities Panel of the Birmuda Water Conservation Association, at its meeting in June 1998, directed Chairman Nat' Spring to appoint a committee to study the proper role for river authorities in this important aspect of water resource management.   Sadly, the cholera outbreak of 1999 decimated the team and prospective water testers are sought; e-mail: diarrhea&vomiting@bermuda.com
icon of a truck
Oil Technicians
Directional Drilling Operator - Junior

Birmuda's oil fields look set to supply the country's fuel needs into the next millennium.   Become part of the future ...

Operates various pieces of equipment under close supervision at a field site. Assists with coordinating and scheduling generating station/sub-station electrical or mechanical operations. Visually inspects equipment. May assist with issuing work and test permits to electrical and mechanical personnel. e-mail: oilBthere@birmuda.com




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